Thursday, July 12, 2012

Dave on the news!

One of the local TV stations did a story on the new program sponsored by the Alzheimer's Assoc.. It is called Memory Buffet, it is a scheduled social activity for people with early stage Alzheimer's.  Following is the link, just highlight the address, right click and open. It should take you to the video.  Dave did a good job, very proud of him!!


http://fourstateshomepage.com/fulltext/?nxd_id=299042

Monica

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

An emotional day.

Today has been one of those days, maybe its the change in the weather or maybe its the medication change or maybe its just the progression of the disease but whatever the cause its been just one of those days.  I was going to just write things down in my journal but decided to write things down here.

I have read that one of the changes or characteristics of someone with AD is how they become very emotional.  Well I can attest to that. I have seen Dave become so emotional over things that never bothered him before, tears well up in eyes and he looks sad.  Usually its no big deal if we are at home or even in the car because if he cries, he cries its only us around. Sometimes he gets this way in the middle of the store.  Today that happened and I couldn't help but feel sad too.  Dave always says "Don't feel sorry for me. Don't cry."  This just makes me more sad and I want to cry even more but in the middle of the store you learn to become distracted so you  both don't look foolish. What happens to those emotions? I think usually for Dave they pass because he can't remember what made him emotional, for me I sit up into the late hours of the night and cry.  Tonight I am crying, blogging and listening to one of my favorite videos, When I Call on Jesus by Nicole C.  Mullen.


We know there will be days like this and of course they seem worse when there is a weather change.  I also notice this more when Dave is tired and he seems tired all the time. With the increase in his medication he wakes up bright eyed but he said he fights the tiredness all day. He said its always just under the "surface".  I try to find things for us to do everyday to keep him from spending all day napping on the couch but I still need to take the time to complete household chores.  One of the reasons I feel so emotional tonight is because he lost the memory of his mom and dad. Of course on days like this Dave becomes melancholy and we talk about his progression.  He worries a lot about whats happening or going to happen, today it was about his appetite. We actually went out for a hamburger today and he talked about it like he had never tasted something that good before. Its a place we have gone to before so I just passed it off as him just being hungry so the conversation led to us being happy that his meds haven't taken away his appetite or that he hasn't progressed so much that he doesn't eat.  Then the conversation turned to his mom and dad and he said, "I don't know what happened. I had already left."  He forgot his parents moved to Missouri to be close to him and that they were here when they passed away.  It took me a minute then I said "Well, they were in a nursing home at the end so maybe you didn't realize." Then I saw the look on his face when he realized he had forgotten.   He forgot all those years that his parents were living so close to him. I wanted to cry for him but instead changed the subject and watched him get a far away look in his eyes.

Even now writing about this incident in the restaurant then again later in the store picking up his refills when he became emotional all I can do is cry.  I cry not just because Dave has forgotten but because I can't tell him anything about those times because that was before me. At some point those things from the years before me will be gone for good and I can't do anything to remind him. All I can think is how much I want the old Dave back. How much I miss the man I fell in love with and married.  Even with some changes that seem better with the medication change I can see him slipping away. Its slow and some days I don't notice at all and then there are days when you can't ignore it. I feel an urgency to record as many things as possible to keep him here with us, to keep him from being lost.

I know how important it is to be positive, look for the good, joyful times but some days I need to just look at all this straight in face and let the emotions go.  I cry, become angry and even have to admit how envious I am of others who can continue on their planned future and living the kind of life I had envisioned but has now been taken away. 

Tomorrow will be a new day and I know that God will take care of it all. I trust in Him and have faith. I know He is walking besides us and carries us when we can no longer walk on our own.



                                                       
                                                                 
 Monica

Friday, July 6, 2012

Art Show

It is finally time for those paintings that everyone was doing in the Memories in the Making painting class through the Alzheimer's Assoc to be on display!! They are located on the second floor at Spiva Center of the Arts. We are very excited to see Dave's paintings in frames and on the walls. For a minimum donation of $50 one of the many paintings can be yours! If you're in town go and take a look you might find some awesome art work for your home or office (doesn't even have to be one of Dave's). All monies go to the Southwest Missouri Alzheimer's Assoc.


"Rainbow Sky"



"Tropical Ocean"






"Canyon River"




"Dark Mountains"





"Desert Canyon"

The history of Memories in the Making
Who to contact if interested in purchasing any of the paintings.

We appreciate everyone's support for not just us personally but supporting the Alzheimer's Association. 

Monica

Happy Fourth of July!


The 4th of July has always been Dave's most favorite holiday.   He states that growing up in California, fireworks were banned so when he moved to Missouri many years ago he celebrated the 4th with lots and lots of fireworks!

The first 4th I spent with Dave, Adam and Dustin was crazy!! I never saw so many fireworks. Dave was like a kid, it was so much fun watching the three of them. Every year up to last year was the same. We spent the fourth with various friends/family but Dave's excitement and joy was the same.  We had fun walking up and down all the aisles at the stores/tents picking and choosing which fireworks would give us the biggest bang and the best show of bright colors. FUN!!!

This year we spent with our good friends Mark & DeGee and their kids along with Mark's parents and another set of their friends.  The girls played games on the Wii or outside doing whatever teenage girls do! The grown ups talked. We had some delicious food and homemade ice cream!! Mmmm!!!

Gabriella with Alyssa and Lauren "dancing".


Hmmm! Aren't they all supposed to be doing the same move???
Later when it was dark it was time for the fireworks!! Last year Dave set off a few but this year he sat and watched with the rest of us.

Getting ready to set off the lantern!
Fountain
Dave thought this one looked like a palm tree!

Sunday, July 1, 2012

Asking with a believing heart and blessings occur.

Man oh man is it hot! Wish we could get some rain so the few plants we have around would perk up. Not much fun staying indoors when you feel you should be out getting some sun. Funny how the sun can help you perk up but too much is really bad (plants burn up along with your skin if you're not careful).

Well we didn't get any rain but we sure have perked up around here.  A few post back I stated that there was so much to get done around the house and how over whelmed I have been feeling because of it all. Its always the small stuff that can bring a person down the hardest. I plugged along and prayed for God to get me through each project. My prayers have been answered over and over again. First, my sister Linda came down and helped me purge out so much stuff freeing not only valuable space in our home but in our mental state as well. Second, my sister-in-law Anita, came in to town and worked at helping me get some meals in the freezer and gave me some respite!

This last week we had more blessings from Louisiana! I had been talking to our church about needing some help and sent in a request on our "flap" from the bulletin. The church has been helping to coordinate volunteers who have been coming into town to help in the tornado damaged areas but have also been working in other areas. We were blessed to be a family that they worked with. You know that I have had a long list of little things that needed to be taken care of, those small things that made me feel weary because I couldn't figure out what or how to fix them.  Well, that list has become so very small thanks to the group from Louisiana.  They are from First Baptist Bossier in Bossier, Louisiana. (I know that the women's names are correct and a couple of the men's names as well but some are mixed up, sorry I can't remember for sure.)



Brad,Mary,Jeff,Phyllis,Gary,Steve,Jennifer,Jerry,Walter,Peggy,Don


 In the sweltering heat they worked on our yard,cleaned out the gutters,went up to the attic (twice) to cover the vent so the racoons and squirrels could no longer enter, they replaced the mailbox, textured the walls in our bathroom and replaced the faucet in the kitchen that would be easier for Dave to use. I pray they understand what a huge blessing this was for us.  That weariness and overwhelming feeling is gone. It will be so much easier to maintain because the "ground" work has been done. It is so hard to put into words how I feel except that I know that God has promised that when we lean on Him he will take care of us. He has answered so many of our prayers; Dave is not getting as sick as we were worried about with the increase of his medication, another HUGE blessing!


It has always been hard to ask for help but as I have been reminded: when you deny help you deny some one else their blessing from God. I for one do not ever want to deny anyone of a blessing! So humbly we accepted and I pray they are all blessed 20 fold.

Monica