christmas

well we made it through christmas! i have to be honest and say that i am so happy that it is over! the days leading up to it were real downers! the weather was cold and cloudy and we had some precipitation which really affected dave's mood. thankfully on dec 23rd the sun was out and the temps were not too unbearable and dave's mood picked up!!! yay!! we finally were able to get some christmas shopping done..... from now on we will shop on-line (i hate shopping on-line because i like to pick things up, feel them and see if they are worth purchasing and you can't always do that with on-line stuff).

although thanksgiving has always been my most favorite holiday there are some parts of christmas i have always enjoyed....the baking,the decorating, and even buying gifts for everyone is fun. this year i was doing the bare minimum. if it wasn't for gabriella making sugar cookies and pretzel rollo bites and stephanie bringing some goodies herself we wouldn't have had any  christmas treats at all. the only decoration was on the front door and of course our rustic eclectic tree.


as i have said numerous times i am trying to keep get togethers very low key.  no fancy sit down christmas dinner for us. instead i made chili and soup. i was actually organized enough to make the chili ahead of time so on christmas day i only had to put it in the crock-pot to stay warm.

i was barely in the spirit. numerous times before the kids came dave was asking who was coming.  he commented the house would be "full".  was he anxious about the gathering or looking forward to it? i have no idea. i do know he was disappointed about some things and we had moments of sadness and tears,but i would redirect him and his mood would improve.

dave actually did well. he participated in some conversation, played with seeley and even said he needed to lay down for awhile when he became overly stimulated and needed a break. opening gifts was a little awkward. i am not sure he understood what was going on. the kids did well with the gifts they gave him.  he received sweat pants, or athletic pants that would be easy to use and becee made him a "fidget" blanket. it was great! the blanket contains items that dave can manipulate when he is feeling anxious. dave doesn't quite understand the concept but as time goes on i think he will get the idea.

christmas was a lot of work. trying to balance the low key atmosphere with the desire to still want to celebrate was too much for me. i am ready to just not celebrate any more. dave remembers enough to know that holiday time means family time and his mood is low because not all family members are here. he understands that some live too far but then he forgets and he will ask if his family will be coming. he is disappointed that not all the kids come and he cries. it is too much for me. trying to keep my sanity, keep the holiday atmosphere and keep dave's mood even is too much to handle.  he doesn't understand that too many people causes him difficulties and i feel like the bad guy to everyone when i have to budget the time and number of people who come and go. but i know the after effects dave goes through so i have to police the get togethers until others understand.

since christmas dave has done a lot of sleeping. we have had a couple of days of 40 degree weather with sunshine so we spent those days walking around the yard and sitting in the sunshine. we had several large branches break off the trees when we had an ice storm and i dragged them to the back of the yard while dave soaked up the sun.

we are almost back to our regular routine. i used to think it was boring doing the same thing everyday but after the holidays i admit there is something comforting in knowing exactly what is going to happen. i truly understand why routine is so important for the alzheimer's  person.







 

 monica